Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Why, Carol, why?

Long maintenance today. Decided to stop procrastinating and completely redo my addons. I'm trying to make a more efficient UI for the lock, plus need a new addon to make managing eclipse easier on the boomkin. Yesterday after I respecced, a took a quick look at my character screen, thought haste was hit, and concluded that I was hit capped. It was only after Oct asked, "How can you be hit capped with no hit gear?" that I realized my mistake. Oops. Guess I'll be cutting some monarch topazes today and getting an icewalker chant on my boots. Still, I was able to get into a OS 25 pug and did 2021 dps on Sarth with a hit rating of 85. Hard to do leet dps when half your attacks miss, but it did give me an idea of what I can do once I get hit capped, especially since I'm not sure I did 2k on the last Sarth attempt on the warlock before the Ulduar patch hit.

Had an interesting conversation with one of my guildies a couple of days ago where he asked me why I would consider leaving the guild. It's hard to say, "because in other guilds, I wouldn't have to sit, and there are times when I feel like I'm holding the raid back when I'm in." I've said that pre-Ulduar, and gotten lectures about it. I'd be unhappy in a different guild, and I know it.

Anyway, the blog is where I say things that I don't want to say in guild because it could cause drama. My guildies and the leadership are free to read my blog, or not, and take it to heart, or not. This is where I share my frustrations, not only about the game, but about being disabled in America. Gaming brings out awareness of barriers and attitudes that don't always come to the forefront in real life. This isn't always a bad thing - the hurt that I kept buried deep inside fed a horrible cycle of depression that I'm finally feeling free from.

When I look at different guilds, that's all I'm doing. I don't regret joining CRC a year ago, and I hope that Dev doesn't regret inviting me and making me a raid member. Given that I've given him ample opportunity to say otherwise, I don't think he does.

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